Preparing a toddler for the hospital

My son is very similar to me in that he likes to be prepared and know what’s coming.  New experiences are more easily tolerated when he is warned about potential change so he feels in control and like he knows what’s coming.  To that end, there are a number of ways we prepared P for his allergy trials and I thought some of it may be helpful for other parents.  Pick and choose what pertains to you and your experience as you need, these are all just ideas.

• Read books about doctor’s visits and hospitalizations: Some of our favorites include The Berentstain Bears Go to the Doctor (Stan Berenstain) and My Trip to the Hospital (Mercer Mayer), but there are so many out there.  Madeline, Curious George, Little Princess Story, etc.  Choose one with your child’s favorite character (Caillou, Dora, Elmo, Corduroy, Franklin, Maisy, and various Disney characters all have books tackling this theme).  P responds so well to stories and wants to read them over and over and over.  It really is his preferred source of new information.  You can check out books from the library about hospitalization rather than buy them.  Also, pinterest and amazon searches reveal dozens of great options.
• Watch short videos: Similar to stories about going to the hospital, videos are also helpful (and many of the same characters I listed above have show versions of their books).  TV time is so infrequent that it’s a big treat and I figure the more mediums the better in helping him comprehend what is coming.  The Mercer Mayer Little Critters book is read by the author himself on youtube.
• Search for (child appropriate) youtube videos on the procedures: There are several videos on youtube that are catered to children.  Obviously don’t show and in depth surgery to your one year old (be sure to watch them yourself ahead of time to make sure they are a good fit), but I found a good clip of a girl getting her blood drawn to show to P.  He watched it several times and I talked him through it each time, explaining the steps in detail (the rubber band will feel tight around your arm / they will poke you with a needle / it may hurt a little bit, but it will go away / they will give you a band-aid afterwards).  By the time we went to the hospital he and I had a whole routine discussing the blood draw procedure and he was super excited for his “really cool” bandaid.
• Tell the truth: As much as you may want to sugar coat things or dumb them down, don’t lie to your child.  They trust you and you are their source of both knowledge and comfort, so acknowledge there could be pain (and whatever other consequences) in a way that doesn’t scare them, but also doesn’t set them up for disappointment.  Less information is better than painting a picture that turns out to be false.
• Be forward thinking: Bribery works people!  Use whatever you know your kid will be happy about and look forward to.  We told P that he’d get stickers and cookies throughout the process and at the end he’d get to come home and play with his toys (while singing “Material Girl” which is his favorite song at the moment).  None of the things we promised are especially amazing (the “cookies” are home-made and allergen free) but just having something to focus on in the future that he knows is safe and fun helps.  I wouldn’t judge any parent who promised a new toys or a trip to get ice cream or a movie either…
• Role play: If you have a medical kit, pretending and acting out even the most basic things can be beneficial (taking blood pressure, listening to heart/lungs with a stethoscope, taking temperature, etc.).  You could also have your child stand on a scale and/or measure their height against a wall – anything to make them familiar with parts of the process will help them once the time comes.  Talk to them about what they are measuring and how it will feel (i.e. “the blood pressure cuff will get really tight and squeeze your arm but then it will get loose again and then it will be all over”).  Using a loved stuffed animal to practice on can help too.  It doesn’t have to be all doom and gloom…role playing can be fun and silly too.  Draw attention to the fact that the goal of all the tests is to make sure your child is healthy (which is a good thing!).
• Bring comfort items: Whether this is your child’s “lovey” or a stuffed animal, try to think of something that could help console your little one when they are sad.  I didn’t bring any toys because I knew the hospital had a toy room.  I did, however, bring Sesame Street band-aids and home-made food treats (donuts, cookies) just in case the hospital didn’t have my previously promised “really cool” bandaids.

Those are just a few ways to prep your kid, but in the end, you definitely want to make sure YOU know what’s planned.  Ask lots of questions beforehand – be as specific as you can.  The fewer surprises, the better (for you both!).

At 2.5 years old, my son blows me away at how well he can understand abstract concepts and future events.  Not all children understand time the way he does, so consider waiting until 1-2 days before the planned hospitalization before going into detail.  Starting too far in advance may just be confusing.

In the end, I am attributing the success of our appointment to both my son’s maturity and bravery as well as the work I did ahead of time.  I don’t want to take anything away from his courage, but I know the tips I just shared were key.